Holiday blues

Morning Fossil, said Phil.

Morning Phil, said Fossil.

Where have you been Phil? Said Fossil.

I have been on holiday Fossil, said Phil.

Listen up Fossil,

Let me tell you all about it.

I don't want to hear about your old holiday Phil, Said Fossil.

All I know is, I was left here on my own with those goats!

Those goats have driven me mad, Phil, mad I say.

You've been sunning yourself on a beach somewhere

And I have had to manage single handed!

It's been bedlam Phil, bedlam, said Fossil.

I am so sorry to hear all about this Fossil, said Phil.

So sorry indeed.

Of course I won't talk about my holiday.

That would be most unfair.

Most unfair to tell you what a lovely time I have had.

I promise I won't talk about my holiday at all.

But I will just show you my best sunbathing position!

Indeed said Fossil.

Hey Phil

Hey Phil! Said Fossil

Why the long face!

007

Hi Fossil, said Phil,

What's on your list today?

My list? Said Fossil.

Yes, your list said Phil.

What is the first thing on your list

To do today?

The first thing on my list to do

Is to double check my identity, said Fossil.

I have installed an eye scanner at the gate entrance.

I have only scanned our eyes in Phil.

I have only scanned our eyes in, but not the goats eyes!

Not the goats eyes? Said Phil,

But that means they won't be able to get into the field.

Our field! Said Fossil.

Tired out

Phew! Said Phil

It has been a long old day.

All that eating and queuing has worn me out.

Worn you out Phil? said Fossil.

Yes Fossil, worn me out.

I just can't keep up with those goats,  and as for Puppy!

Well I don't mind telling you that I need this lie down.

I don't mind a bit of queuing myself, said Fossil,

It gives a bit of purpose to the day.

Just think how good we will be at queuing 

When we can finally do it properly.

But that's just it Fossil, said Phil.

I just don't think I can do it properly.

Indeed said Fossil.

Easter Sunday

Happy Easter Fossil.

Happy Easter Phil, said Fossil.

I have been looking forward to today, said Phil.

Why have you been looking forward? Said Fossil.

I think there might be a few surprises in store said Phil.

Oh no! Said Fossil, I hate surprises.

Surprises don't generally work out so well for me.

I think this surprise might work out very well for you, said Phil,

You will just have to wait and see.

I wonder what it can be? Thought Fossil.

A surprise! For me!

Will I win the lottery I wonder?

Will I win the lottery and have more money than sense?

More money than sense? Said Phil.

Yes, said Fossil, I want more money than sense

I have all this sense at the moment, but no money!

You will just have to wait and see said Phil.

I might just go and ask the goats said Fossil.

Ask the goats if I will have more money than sense.

Goats goats! Said Fossil

Is it true that I am going to have a surprise today?

Is it true that I am going to have more money than sense?

Well you have not got any sense said the goats.

So you won't need to win much money will you!

Fossil,  your surprise is not winning the lottery said Phil.

Maybe it is something much nicer than that.

Wait over there and I will fetch your surprise.

Happy Easter Fossil, said Phil.

Indeed, said Fossil.

Hug

Honestly Fossil, said Phil,

We have gone through thick and thin

With those goats.

Thick and thin Phil?

Yes Fossil, thick and thin.

We have to stick together.

Give us a hug Phil, said Fossil.

Once upon a time

I have a story to tell, said Billy the goat.

I have a story that you won't believe.

I used to live here all on my own said Billy.

It was nice and quiet and I could do whatever I wanted.

There were no donkeys and no other goats.

I did not have to practice queuing.

I did not have to share my field.

Now it's Armageddon! Said Billy.

It's Armageddon and it's here now.

Armageddon? Said Puppy.

Yes, said Billy, it's Armageddon.

I am going to tell the goats said Puppy.

Goats, goats, Billy says it's Armageddon!

We don't believe it said the goats.

We don't believe it's Armageddon.

You had better tell the donkeys.

You had better tell the donkeys

Before Armageddon arrives.

Fossil, Phil I must tell you something.

I must tell you something that Billy said.

It's Armageddon! Said Puppy.

I have to tell you before it gets here.

I think it's already here said Billy.

Better take cover then said Phil.

Indeed said Fossil.

Lost puppy

I am lost said Puppy.

We have found you said the goats.

I am not sure that makes me feel glad, said Puppy.

The great escape

I will look this way Fossil.

I will look this way Phil.

What are we looking for Phil? Said Fossil.

We are looking for those goats! Said Phil.

Puppy had a plan, remember?

A plan to escape those goats!

A plan to escape those goats?

I don't think it can be done! Said Fossil.

Just walk past them nonchalantly said Phil.

Nonchalantly? Said Fossil

Yes, nonchalantly said Phil.

Just walk past them nonchalantly and they won't notice a thing.

We will put our glasses on and

keep our heads down.

I think we got away with it said Phil.

Indeed said Fossil.

Lovely and warm

It's so lovely and warm today said Phil.

It's so lovely and warm.

I am going to have a sunbathe.

DO NOT DISTURB said Fossil.

Goats learn to queue

Hello goats said Fossil and Phil.

Hello Fossil and Phil said the goats.

What are you doing? Said Fossil and Phil.

We are learning to queue said the goats.

Carry on dancing

Come on Fossil, said Phil.

We are going to learn a new dance.

What is it called Phil? said Fossil.

It's called the Hokey Cokey!

You put your right foot in

You put your right foot out.

Come on Nog. Come on Puppy

Put your right foot in

Your right foot out.

In out in out. . . 

Shake it all about.

Indeed, said Fossil.

Nog

Look fossil. Look Phil.

I am the under dog.

Said Nog.

Phil and Fossil learn to dance

I feel like dancing said Fossil

That's good, said Phil, because I feel like dancing too.

How do we start Fossil? Said Phil.

I am not sure said Fossil.

Maybe this way? 

No, said Phil, I think it goes like this.

We are going to do the soft shoe shuffle.

But we have got hard shoes said Fossil.

Never mind that said Phil.

I think we are very good dancers.

Indeed said Fossil.

Phil guards his grass

Move over Phil, said Fossil.

I want to eat that bit of grass.

Go away Fossil. This is my bit of grass.

This is my bit of grass. And I am guarding it.

You can't guard grass said Fossil!

Oh yes I can, said Phil.

I am going to guard this grass.

No one else is going to eat it.

I am going to sneak round the back, said Fossil.

I am going to sneak round the back and eat that grass.

You are worse than the goats said Phil.

Indeed said Fossil.

Hello said cat

Phil? said Fossil.

Yes Fossil, said Phil.

There is no room in this field for any more animals.

I agree said Phil.

It is very crowded these days.

This is our field said Fossil.

I don't like it too crowded.

I concur, said Phil.

I don't like it too crowded either.

Room for a small one, said Cat.

Phil goes into hiding

I am fed up with you all, said Phil.

I am going to go into hiding.

I am going to hide under here and you won't see me.

Hide under there? Said the goats.

Hide under there? Said Fossil.

Yes, said Phil, I am going to hide under here.

I am going to hide under here and you won't see me!

Of course we can see you said Fossil.

Phil tries to tell a joke

Fossil, Fossil, said Phil.

I have a funny joke to tell you.

Can I whisper it in your ear?

I will whisper it in your ear, said Phil, 

And you will fall down laughing.

No I wont! said Fossil.

Whisper it in your own ear.

I wont fall down laughing, Phil.

I don't want to hear your old joke!

Well, said Phil, you are not a very good friend Fossil.

I am going to tell my funny joke to someone.

I am going to tell it to Puppy.

I will whisper it in her ear.

I will whisper it in her ear and

She will fall down laughing!

I wont fall down laughing, said Puppy.

You are not going to whisper your joke in my ear!

Whisper it in your own ear!

Well,said Phil, you are not a good friend.

I am going to tell the goats my funny joke.

The goats will be my good friends.

They will listen to my funny joke.

I will whisper it in their ears said Phil

And they will fall down laughing.

We wont fall down laughing, said the goats.

You will not whisper your joke in our ears!

Whisper it in your own ear!

Right! said Phil. I will whisper the joke in my own ear.

I will fall down laughing!

Indeed, said Fossil.

Follow my leader

Hello, said Nog, today we are going to play follow my leader.

Come on Fossil, said Nog, follow me.

We will play said the goats.

Wait for us said Fossil and Phil.

We want to play follow my leader too.

I don't want to play said Puppy.

I am going to sit here!

Fossil and Phil do their chores

We have a lot to do today Fossil, said Phil.

What are we up to? Said Fossil.

We are going to do our chores, said Phil.

I don't like the sound of that said Fossil.

Let me help you get your coat off then we will get started, said Phil.

First we are going to tidy the stable said Phil.

I will put the old straw outside said Fossil.

Well done Fossil, said Phil, we will get the stable all tidy.

All tidy before the goats come? Said Fossil.

Yes, said Phil, all tidy before the goats come.

Look at this! Said Fossil and Phil.

Our stable is immaculately tidy now.

Not any more said the goats.

We said we would be a nuisance said the goats.

Indeed said Fossil.